Separation of Sports and State

I just wanted to clarify some things regarding my sports/state separation stance, lest anyone think I'm an asportsiest.

First of all, I have nothing against sports, so long as the government keeps its paws out of same, and vice versa. What people do in the privacy of their homes or sports facilities is no business of mine, so long as I'm not being asked to watch, listen to, buy tickets for, or feign interest in athletics.

Secondly, honor, integrity, goodwill, and group pride and unity are hardly qualities uniquely found in (or uniquely promoted by) athletics, despite endless suggestions to this effect in print, on TV, and over loudspeakers.

Thir.... Um, just a second--an email just came in.

"Hey, Lee--what are you, against the American way? You don't like sports? What else don't you like? Liberty? The flag? NASCAR? Prepared piano?"

Well, at least he didn't question my manhood. Oops. Here's another one.

"Oh, and are you some kind of sissy? You like cats, Muzak, and you think Rachel Dratch is hot. But you hate sports. 'Nuff said."

Yeah, well, as I'm trying to point out, I don't hate sports. Rather, I want sports kept out of government. I want people to stop behaving as if sports represented the only path to accomplishment, to maturity, to fulfillment, to.... Here's another one.

"Greetings, Lee. I'm with you to a point, but the problem is that the Constitution specifies state/church separation. You know--'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion,' which clearly means that any candidate who mentions religion should be tossed in prison. Whereas, the C. says nothing about state/sports separation."

I see. Are we to presume, then, that everything BUT religion can be promoted, hand over fist, by our tax dollars? I'm sorry, but....

"That's a straw man argument."

No, it isn't. I'm taking your point to its logical limit--i.e., if there's no basis for restricting state/sports interaction simply because the issue isn't addressed in print, then....

Wait....

"Hi, I recently left West Bosgodia with three million dollars that my husband the ex-King, had safelly hidden from those, who illegally seized power... I arrived today in United, States today, and naturally, I don't feel safe to carrying around three million dollars. I need the help, of good people like you--If you are would be willing to cash for me a check, of the amount $50,000 and send $40,000 back to me...."

Ha. Fool me once....

TO BE CONTINUED

Lee